Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just cut my nipple shaving
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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