you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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