The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
sex in a hospital.. check
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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