I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
The police scanner is talking about you again....
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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