someone threw a dead crab at me
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
True strength comes from lack of pants
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