Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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