He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
