member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
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He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
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I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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