he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
