I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Randomize
