Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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