Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
