Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
