is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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