Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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