I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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