I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize