Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
There was a lot of him and a little penis
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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