In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
