just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
