He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
