walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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