That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
