so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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