You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
