I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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