i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
