I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize