Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
