So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Randomize