I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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