Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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