Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
the day after is always just damage control
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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