well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
