i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
