and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize