She said her name was "party"
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
