I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
