You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
