Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
