I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
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Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
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The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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