Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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