Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
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