Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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