Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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