out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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