Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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