I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
