Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
