just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
i dont even know how to be here
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
not ubering you a puppy
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
