I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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